I recently came by a belief system many people have, that is making their lives very difficult, to say the least. Once I got aware of it, I could see it everywhere – playing out in different forms – always hiding in different outfits, like a virus, that tries to adjust to survive.
Yes, this belief system has befallen many personal thought systems and it’s time, to bring it to the light. I call it the PHTC-Virus and will explain what PHTC stands for in a minute and what makes it so malicious…
Where I first got aware of the PHTC-Virus
I first came by PHTC in the business world. In a Telegram room, the founders of a project were explaining their business model and why it didn’t work out over the past weeks and who was to blame. People simply didn’t understand what they are doing and had to change their minds about them, was their opinion.
One could easily say: „Please stop the whining!”, but that doesn’t help.
Instead, I took my lamp and had a closer look, and what I found was nothing more than the basis of many thought systems out there.
What these founders were explaining was, that people had to understand what they are doing/deciding and why this new way is the best choice for everyone.
Once people would get that, everything would work out.
My immediate reaction was to tell them, that a business model based on the premise that „people have to change” will never work out.
It’s set up for failure, for many reasons:
- People don’t change. At least not on a core level of their mind. Doesn’t happen very often. Every real change is on the level of mind.
- People don’t change, because other people tell them so.
- Making you(r) (business) dependent on other peoples change of mind, is putting your power into the hand of others. You become powerless and „the other” all powerful.
While looking at this microcosm of the business world and how many businesses actually fail out of the hidden belief, that once „people change” their mind about their product, their business would flourish, I realized, that the PHTC (People have to change)-Virus was also very much alive and spreading all over personal minds.
The PHTC-Virus in action
Now let’s have a look at the PHTC-Virus in action outside the business world, shall we?
Ever wished your partner would change, so that your relationship would work out? Or your parents, children, friends, colleagues or even your boss? How often did this actually happen in your life, that people suddenly change, when you say so? Zero times or even less?
You may say now, that 30 years ago you said something to your Auntie and she suddenly changed her mind and gave you the cookie that you so desperately longed for. Ok, you are on a run and this certainly proves, that PHTC does work if you just cry enough. Maybe you are the exception, but let me tell you, that for most people this is not the case.
Every time, we want others (or „the world”) to change so that we can be in peace and joy, we are under the secret influence of the PHTC-Virus.
The virus uses all different kind of covers. Sometimes it will even take the cover of love – like in „I only want the best for you!”.
Another cover-up is „giving good advice” to others, how changing their minds, will enhance their wellbeing.
The problem with these well-meant actions to make other people change is our core belief, that once others would finally follow our way to look at the world, everyone would be better off.
The problem is, that if they don’t change, we feel misunderstood. The constant feeling to be misunderstood by other people or the world leads us to a victim role, that is a direct result of giving our power away at first. Yes, WE are giving our power away. It’s never „the other” who took it.
If you ever feel like a victim, you can be sure, that the PHTC-Virus has befallen you.
Why we get infected by PHTC
What the PHTC-Virus shows us is, that projection doesn’t work and it doesn’t matter how much we wished it did. and how much we try
The true reason, why we want people to change their minds is, because inside we know, that we are the ones who have all the power and it’s up to us to change our own mind. We don’t want to be responsible though, so we project this need outside on „other people”.
Truth be told, there are no „other people” at all – only movie screens where we project the content of our own minds.
The world and other people are wholly neutral by themselves. They are literally nothing or as it is called in Buddhism „empty”.
Our ego has a basic premise, that it wants to preserve by all means: Someone has to be guilty of things going wrong.
Because guilt feels bad, we try to get rid of it (= projection) and demand, that others only need to change, for us (and them) to succeed.
PHTC shows itself in business and in our private life. Someone has done something wrong and that’s why they have to change, to restate the order of the universe again. Our universe – the way we want it because it’s the right way…This is the ego’s story, how guilt should be resolved.
In other words: PHTC is the egos answer to the question, what should be done with the devastating feeling of guilt.
The answer is in the question
Maybe reading this article, you could have an honest look at your own life and how it’s affected by the PHTC-Virus.
The next time you feel it in you and want other people to change, just ask yourself this question:
„What if the other person doesn’t change and never will?”
Don’t ever expect anyone to change, because they don’t have to and most likely never will. What are your options, when you stop projecting change onto others? Who or what is left to change then?
The change this is hinting at, is not on the level of personality, but much more essential. It’s about returning your awareness from others and the world to the place of truth and peace inside.
It doesn’t matter, who what you want to change. The only thing of importance is to realize, that you want to change (others/the world) and that the reason for this is, that someone else has to be guilty of things going wrong. This belief in guilt is the only thing that really needs to change and it is found only in one place: your own Mind.
Love and Blessings,