In a world where we think of ourselves as human beings, errors happen all the time. In
What follows is a constant free floating and mostly unconscious guilt – the feeling, that we have done something wrong – that gets triggered and intensified by our daily errors and the ones of our surrounding.
The wrong-minded way to handle errors
How we usually deal with errors is mostly „a maladapted solution to a non-existent problem“. Errors trigger our unconscious guilt and they suddenly become a very serious problem that hooks us on a personal level.
Contrary to our belief, that errors cause guilt, it’s much more so that errors remind us of our guilt and are (for our ego) a very welcome opportunity to project. As stated in previous articles, guilt comes first and errors are just an expression of it and not the other way around (See „Reversing cause and effect“)
Besides that, there
This happens through a very clever system of smoke (denial) and mirrors (projection). Let’s have a look at two
John considers himself an expert in cryptocurrencies and spends a lot of time in internet forums on that topic. Each time someone states an error regarding a company or project he sees it as an attack and instantly falls into the defender role. What he sees is blame and guilt and he tries to correct this through his knowledge that he shares (even if not asked for his opinion). In reality, John is horrified of the guilt inside of him and sees it as blame. Other people stating errors is his trigger to defend his innocence (and the one of others), so that he can keep up his story of being „a good guy“. John should face his guilt instead.
Sue is obsessed with relationships and how to make them work. She reads a lot on this topic, visits many workshops and has recently became a coach for relationship issues herself. She has found hundreds of great strategies, how to avoid errors in communication between partners and sees herself as trying to help people to „do it right“. Each time an error in communication happens, she has a clever counter-strategy and tells people about it. They all have absolute moral meaning for her. In reality Sue is overwhelmed by guilt of her previous relationships failing and tries to avoid this feeling at all cost. She should look at her underlying guilt instead.
The moment we see errors as expressions or cause of guilt, our ego takes it personally, but instead of looking at the main cause, it will find endless ways to avoid, repair or defend against it. It makes errors a serious reality.
The right-minded way to handle errors
The first thing to realize regarding errors is, that they are never personal and always an invitation to look at the underlying guilt. It’s not „sometimes“ or „could be that way“, but this is the very basis of all further steps. As long as our egos deny this, there is no way out of the guilt spiral, since one way or the other, our ego will make guilt real for us.
Instead of looking for better strategies to get rid of guilt and holding up our picture of being the good guy/girl, we dare to look at the deeper need to see attack and defense in our world. All these strategies want to prove to the world and ourselves that we are innocent. Just stop for a moment and see, how much time and energy flows into this and how much we seem to believe that we are guilty indeed. Remember: Defenses do what they defend. So trying to prove your innocence means, that you believe that you are guilty.
Underlying all forms of special guilt lies the one common one: the belief that we are separated from God. So John’s defensiveness about his investments as well as Sue’s attempts to optimize communication and avoid errors in relationships are not the real problem at all!
There is only one problem (taking the idea of separation seriously) and one solution: seeing that this separation has never happened (and guilt therefore being unreal).
You are not invited to tell your boss that his seeing of your errors is caused by his belief in
Don’t get defensive and always remember, that this is just another opportunity to go inside and look for your special guilt that leads you to the primary guilt. To react right-minded simply means to be aware that there is only one problem and one solution ever.
Peaceful problem solving
The result of your awareness of the real cause for your guilt and not reacting in the usual
The moment you see that all your attempts to optimize your communication and share your new wisdom with the world are only ways to cover up your underlying guilt of your imagined separation from God, you simply stop. You don’t need better tools or more wisdom to solve errors – maybe only on the practical level of form, but not in reality and the level of cause that is your mind.
The more that peace is your goal, the less you will think that it is found in the world of attack and defense. Ultimately there is no solution at all in the world of form – simply for the reason, that error and guilt have no relation in reality. So the next time you are faced by an error, just look if you can resolve it and look for the deeper guilt instead.
Another thing that is really helpful is to look at all the ways you want to be right. Each time we want to be right, we decide against happiness and peace. Trying to be right is a sign of the ego at work and that we therefore automatically believe in attack and defense (or right vs. wrong).
This can be very tricky sometimes, because wanting to be right covers behind sophisticated knowledge and a wall of arguments. So you’ll need a lot of honesty with yourself to track it down.
Most of all, follow the silent calling of peace. This is the voice of the Holy Spirit that is calling you home. Treat yourself lightly and with a smile on your face. We are all in this together.
Love and Blessings,